Ever wonder if you could build a therapy practice that supports your dreams of traveling the world while raising a child? In this episode of The Traveling Therapist Podcast, I chat with Carly Kerr, Founder & Therapist at AZ Synergy Counseling, about becoming a traveling therapist as a single mom. Carly’s story is raw, real, and incredibly inspiring.
She opens up about navigating burnout, ADHD, private practice headaches, and a surprise early maternity leave. Through it all, Carly found her way to Portugal, where she discovered a sense of peace and purpose that changed everything. She’s now planning her move abroad and building a business and life that finally feels good.
In this Episode, We Explore…
Connect with Carly:
Website - http://www.azsynergycounseling.com/
Email - carlykerr@azsynergycounseling.com
Connect with me:
Instagram: @thetravelingtherapist_kym
The Traveling Therapist Membership: www.kymtolson.kartra.com/page/travelingtherapistmembership
Revolutionize Your Private Practice with AI Course: www.kymtolson.kartra.com/page/ai
Signup to learn more about life as a Traveling Therapist: https://www.portablepracticemethod.com/free-training
The Traveling Therapist Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/onlineandtraveling/
Bill Like A Boss Insurance Billing Community: www.kymtolson.kartra.com/page/blab
Subscribe to the Podcast:
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Transcript:
[00:00:00] Kym: Hey everybody. Welcome back to another episode of The Traveling Therapist podcast. Really excited to have our guest today. I feel like I've known her forever. I don't know why, just on Facebook, social media. I feel like I've just known you forever. Carly Kerr is here with us.
[00:00:12] Carly, I'm so excited to have you here. One, because I've just known you over the years. I've kind of watched you evolve really with your own private practice and how you've like. Kind of built your practice and all that stuff. So it's been cool to watch that. And now to have you evolving into a traveling therapist, I'm really excited about that, to have you tell your story and let everybody know about this journey that you're on. So I always start out and just say, how did you go from being a traditional therapist to a traveling therapist?
[00:00:40] Carly: Well, thank you for having me. you are like my business mentor. I have followed you and we've connected, you've helped me through a lot of things, which I'll include in my, how did I get here? But I'm so grateful to actually get, to spend more time not on billing related questions
[00:00:57] you've really inspired me and I've, really gotten a lot of good information from your podcast and, you know, your websites and all the things that you do. So I'm very, very excited to come and share today. I started listening to your podcast. I've never listened to podcasts until.
[00:01:14] Maybe six months ago, and yours was the first one I turned on and I was like, okay, I'm just gonna binge this. And you have been in my ear almost daily
[00:01:24] Kym: You're like, I know everything about you. I know you don't like this, this, this. No,
[00:01:27] I'm just kidding.
[00:01:27] Carly: Right. And so just like listening to the different guests and where they were at in their different journeys and how they came to be into a traveling therapist. So that was really a big part of this journey for me, was just listening to people who have done it, who are doing it and starting to realize, I think I could do that. I think I want to do that. I've always wanted to travel, but I could never afford it.
[00:01:53] Kym: Mm-hmm.
[00:01:53] Carly: I still don't really think I can afford it. So I had to start thinking about how do I. How do I incorporate it? And, this is the first time I've ever told my story. This is the first time I've ever even like written it down .
[00:02:05] Kym: Oh my gosh. Exciting.
[00:02:06] Carly: oh, so exciting and so much vulnerability.
[00:02:09] Kym: Yes.
[00:02:10] Carly: we go. So I, I hope so, because a lot of your guests, even people who are like in the beginning stages of their journey.
[00:02:17] Were really, really helpful for me. Just like, oh, I never thought of that. Or, oh, maybe I can do that. So I sat down on the beach in Portugal and I said, I'm gonna write my journey. And it brought up a lot of stuff because like I said, I've never put it all together. So, my first career was elementary school teacher.
[00:02:34] I did that for about seven years and probably year three, which is where most teachers quit I said I have to do something different. So I went to grad school, got my master's in counseling. So I was teaching kindergarten by day, doing grad school at night. Basically holding on for dear life.
[00:02:50] It was such a challenge. So I graduated in 2015. I did my internship in an inpatient hospital.
[00:02:56] I started in the deep end, I started working with suicidality. From day one, And then I got hired at the hospital. In fact, before my internship was even over, my mentor created a job for me and said, all right, here you go.
[00:03:09] So I started doing psychoeducation groups twice a day, five days a week in the inpatient units. And then it just evolved. I get really bored really fast.
[00:03:20] probably about once a year I'd go to my boss and I'd say, I'm done. I need a different job. What else can I do? So I worked on the medical floors doing assessments. I worked on the emergency department. I did intensive outpatient intakes. Then I ran my own intensive outpatient group, and meanwhile I was starting to kind of develop my likes. I'm not gonna say specialty at that point, but it was just my likes.
[00:03:45] So then my boss just basically said, whatever you wanna do, you can do it It was amazing. So I said, I wanna start um, a support group for trans folks. And he was like, okay.
[00:03:54] so I did that for a while and then I ran out of jobs to do and
[00:03:58] oh. No. Oh, what's happening? So when I was an intern, he took me to an American Association of Suicidology Conference, and he's probably 35 years older than me, so he was like, I need somebody to run my PowerPoint. I said, I'm game. So we flew to Atlanta we went to this conference on Suicidology and, He did a presentation. I helped him do the presentation, and then I went to a workshop by the Trevor Project
[00:04:25] Kym: Oh wow.
[00:04:26] Carly: was like, I just didn't even have words. And so that sparked my desire to start working with the L-G-B-T-Q community.
[00:04:34] it was just all the dots connected. And I know you're a little woo woo.
[00:04:37] I'm a little woo woo too. So I'm paying attention to like, just all the signs.
[00:04:41] Kym: Yeah. It's all aligning.
[00:04:43] Carly: It is. I started getting more training, more education. I started getting into the communities, meeting people, figuring out like, what does the community need? And it turns out there's a high need for support.
[00:04:54] Particularly I was in The northwest valley of the Phoenix,
[00:04:58] Kym: Oh yeah. Mm-hmm.
[00:04:59] Carly: and there was nobody, and this is 20 16, 17, so pre pandemic, there's nobody. So I went, all right, well there's a need. I'm just gonna run with it. And then I joined with the University of Arizona College of Medicine and we started doing trainings across the hospital system.
[00:05:19] And so, yeah, so then I was like, oh, I'm training, which teaching is like in my blood. So I loved that and it was so much, I mean, I was probably doing. At least, let's see, three, at least 12 trainings a month. So at least three a week traveling to different hospitals you know, and it was all on like, L-G-B-T-Q, but primarily trans healthcare.
[00:05:42] So what can we do as a hospital system to be more inclusive, to not say the stupid things that happen and just, you know, be better. And I loved it. I absolutely loved it. However, I was managing up, which I later learned as kind of one of my kryptonites. I like to sit on the bottom and say, Hey, everybody up there, like, do it this way.
[00:06:03] But the corporate leaders weren't attending the trainings and so it was like I was doing all this work, putting all this energy and, and just all of my passion and nothing was changing. And it was just so disheartening. So in 2018, I was like, I'm gonna start a private practice . Never was on my radar when I went to school to be a counselor or a therapist I never thought about private practice. So I started my private practice and I continued to work at the hospital and I did that for a few years. And then 2019 came and I said, I'm done.
[00:06:32] I've done all the things in the hospital. I need something else. And I got what I thought was my dream job at Arizona State University.
[00:06:41] And so that was really exciting for me. I got to travel to all of the campuses. They have four campuses in the valley, so I got to travel so I wasn't in one seat.
[00:06:50] All day for 40 hours a week, which I desperately needed. I needed to drive and travel and in January of 2020, I started my EMDR training. So I'm riding the shuttle to the different campuses. I'm reading my Shapiro book. I'm like , This is, this is just great.
[00:07:10] Everything changed, right? And so as I'm listening to your early episodes, that was like a pivotal moment for so, so many people. And for me it was as well, and in many ways some not so glamorous. And so I got thrown back into crisis work because I had that background.
[00:07:27] And now doing virtual crisis work. And was totally unaware of how not Okay I was and how like, not with it. I was, my, my hyper functioning and you know, just like, go, go go, was taking over and I wasn't loving it. I just was like, this is not what I signed up for. This is not what I wanna do. I don't wanna do crisis work.
[00:07:47] We had a few events that were less than optimal just in terms of how they were handled. So for example, I had one where there was this person in crisis trying to get out of a domestic violence situation. She calls for help. I'm like, oh my gosh, we're walking through it. And I said, well, let's call the police.
[00:08:04] Let's get you some support to get you out of there. And they took her to jail.
[00:08:08] Kym: Oh no. Yes.
[00:08:10] Right?
[00:08:10] Carly: being on the other end of the camera. And I just was so helpless and so baffled, like how did that go so wrong? And I just, I, I, so I was struggling. I started a group practice
[00:08:24] Kym: Okay. Right,
[00:08:25] Carly: So I did in this, I did Amber Leida step-by-step program. That's kinda where I started. And then I'm like, I'm gonna start a group practice because I love teaching, I love supervision. And it was in 2020, So I'm at home and you know, why not? things were not clicking very well. So, I'm doing this group practice and I decide, well, I want my associates to be able to take insurance.
[00:08:46] I was all private pay up to that point and I was doing well. Totally stocked, no issues. Okay, let's connect with Kim Tolson. So that's where I connected with you. I took your course tried to do all the credentialing on my own. Needless to say, my executive dysfunction did not help the situation and it became pretty much a disaster of epic
[00:09:07] Kym: Mm-hmm. Oh
[00:09:08] Carly: so I tried credentialing with two companies. One took nine months
[00:09:13] Kym: Oh my
[00:09:13] Carly: to even get credentialed, and the other one was quick and totally screwed everything up and
[00:09:20] Kym: oh my God. Story of the world
[00:09:23] of pillars. Yeah.
[00:09:25] Carly: right. And so that's when I connected with you and you were so gracious, like hopped on Zoom with me and were like, let me help you figure this out.
[00:09:33] basically by the time I got it all figured out I was done. Like mentally I was done. So, probably November of 2020 we had a crisis call and I was still working at a SU and we had a crisis call and I was not responding. I was not participating, and my team was amazing. They were phenomenal.
[00:09:51] And afterwards, one of my dear, dear friends who I now just hold in such high regard, she, she calls me and she says, are you okay? that's not like you. I mean, I froze. I totally froze. And when she called and said, that's not like you, it was like just the wave hit me and I realized I'm not okay
[00:10:07] So in December of 2020, I paused all my clients. I said, here's some referrals, right? I still had associates at the time. I said, here's your new supervisor. My mentor jumped in to provide supervision. I said, I'm not gonna, above all. I will make sure you get your hours. I will not be that supervisor that screws your hours
[00:10:28] Kym: Yeah. Yes.
[00:10:29] Carly: And one of my associates decided to leave at that time. And then shortly thereafter, I don't even know the timeline. The second one left and then probably shortly thereafter, May-ish, maybe the third one left. And I took a three month hiatus and I went to eating disorder treatment
[00:10:45] Kym: Oh my
[00:10:46] Carly: because turns I had to Eating disorder. And I just never really. Paid attention to it. So it was really big. It was a whole big gut punch of, wow, I am still producing, I am still seeing clients, I am still running a business
[00:11:02] and I am not okay. And I share this because I want people to know how easy it is for us to not know how not okay we are.
[00:11:13] Because we're so focused on everybody else and trying to be successful entrepreneurs. And so I did that and then I came back and I had no group practice anymore. It just was gone.
[00:11:24] And then I was like, well, half of my clients, no, not half, probably a quarter of my clients who were private pay.
[00:11:31] I then got credentialed with their insurance. So of course I was taking the pay cut and I was like, damn, why did I do that?
[00:11:37] Kym: Yeah.
[00:11:38] Carly: But I just said, I'm gonna keep insurance, I'm gonna keep taking insurance. So I signed up with Alma using your link,
[00:11:43] Because you have been so helpful. I tried to support where people support me, and so I've been taking Alma ever since and as of now, like half my caseload is insurance.
[00:11:53] And just a little alma plug. Oh my gosh. I just love not having to spend hours on the phone with Aetna crying and screaming and saying what is happening.
[00:12:02] Like, it has been a game changer. And in fact their rate was, and I know that there's a lot of opinions about it, and I don't love the whole big,
[00:12:09] Kym: big tech. Right? I know it's a big deal.
[00:12:12] Carly: It is a big deal and I can appreciate that and I just needed that extra income. point in my life where I
[00:12:20] Kym: why I almost sponsors this podcast. I mean, they are such a good solution, you know, you'll never convince me otherwise. They're such a good solution, especially for people like with what you're talking about, so I'm glad that it helped you.
[00:12:31] Carly: Yeah, it, and it's been great. I've not missed a paycheck, I've not had an issue. Like it has been really great. So I'm starting to get my life back on track. I'm like, what do I wanna do with my business? What do I want with my life? So I decide I'm gonna get pregnant?
[00:12:45] Kym: Well, that's a good idea.
[00:12:46] Carly: right. Of all things. But it's something I'd wanted to do my entire life. And I realized I was pushing 40.
[00:12:52] And my time was running, and I just said, okay. So, I started the IVF process, which was not for the faint of heart. And I was so grateful that I, quit a SU.
[00:13:03] Kym: okay.
[00:13:03] Carly: came back from treatment, I quit a SU. So by 2021 I was solely private practice.
[00:13:08] so big and scary. But I did it. I made the gym and then because I was in private practice, I was able to do all of my IVF appointments. I was able to schedule my life around me. And that is for anyone out there who's like, I'm too afraid to leave the, you know, the W2 job.
[00:13:27] Like, for me, the freedom, the flexibility was a game changer. It was everything. absolutely loved it. So I was able to get pregnant. I did round one and then I spent seven months just miserable. Literally puking in between every single client and everybody was so amazing. So my due date is March 20, 22.
[00:13:49] December rolls around and I keep having to go to the dang hospital. I'm like, what's wrong? Nobody really knows what's wrong. Well, what was wrong was I, was I having contractions?
[00:13:56] So all of a sudden I find myself, I was not prepared. 'cause again, executive dysfunction, I was not prepared.
[00:14:02] And so anyone that's getting pregnant, ooh, get your game plan done. Like early, I was literally laying in a hospital bed, typing out my notice to all clients. Here are your referrals. I'm not coming back for a while.
[00:14:17] And so that was a big, like, oh crap. There was no closure. There was no like, Hey, I'm so sorry.
[00:14:24] I mean, it was literally like the, an email that just said, I'm so sorry. This is unforeseen. I'm not due for another four months So I basically had to take my maternity leave. Before the baby was born.
[00:14:35] Kym: Hmm.
[00:14:35] Carly: he came actually in January instead of March. He came nine weeks early spent seven weeks in the nicu. And probably about week four, I had to start seeing clients again.
[00:14:46] I had already been off for three months. I've got to, and no, I have not taken Jeannie Schiller's advice about taxes and savings and no, I have not taken anyone's advice didn't do any of it. yeah, I, I did all the mistakes, literally every, every mistake you could make, I did all the mistakes and I'm still going strong, so.
[00:15:06] If you're making all the mistakes, keep going.
[00:15:08] You'll be all right. Currently, I think I have $40 in my retirement account,
[00:15:13] Kym: Okay. Well to start.
[00:15:14] Carly: started, so I had to start seeing clients, so I would see just a couple a week and then eventually I built back up to like 10 clients a week.
[00:15:22] Then I realized, oh my gosh, I can't do this by myself. I'm a single parent. I'm trying to run a business. I'm trying to take care of, oh my gosh, what's happening? So, I pack up and move to Idaho where my parents are.
[00:15:33] that's what brought me to Idaho. I did get licensed in Washington, so I'm now licensed in Washington.
[00:15:39] And, over the last, I guess I've been here like two years, I've just been building up my, practice again, and I'm probably roughly about 20 clients a week right now, which is my absolute max. I do definitely do better with 15 than I do with 20. So over the last two years, I've had more stability, but I'm still not happy.
[00:15:55] I'm still not loving life. I'm just. Getting the kid ready, taking him to school, seeing my clients, making dinner, pick up the kid, rinse and repeat, enter Kim Tolsons Traveling Therapist podcast.
[00:16:06] So all of that, I look at that and I'm like, okay, things are getting easier, but I'm still not enjoying life. I'm still not living life.
[00:16:15] so I started listening to your podcast, listening to how the Pandemic really transformed people's lives and their motivation. So for me, it was the election and the first nine days of January, whatever it was, the first whatever part of January that was like three years long with all of my clients
[00:16:35] and I just said I gotta do something different. I gotta do something different. I have to, if I'm going to hold all this heaviness, all of this terror, all of this fear, 'cause again, I primarily work with L-G-B-T-Q clients.
[00:16:48] I have got to have some, peace and serenity and joy on the other side of it.
[00:16:53] Kym: yes.
[00:16:54] Carly: so that's where I was like, I gotta do something different.
[00:16:56] I started listening to Patrick Al's podcast and love that podcast as well. And one of the things, I took from your podcast was when you talked about how does your previous trauma show up in your business?
[00:17:08] And I sat with that. And I'm like, how does my trauma? And so here's my trauma. I have to do it all myself. I looked back at all the hard things and it was probably because I tried to do it all myself.
[00:17:20] So I was like, all right, guess what? In 2025 for the first year ever, I hired an accountant. Actually, that's not true. I did it once and it was terrible. but I tried it again. So I hired an accountant. And that was my first, like, I'm getting help. I'm hiring an accountant. Okay. I'm doing that. And I mean, I'm part of Megan's Elevate membership.
[00:17:39] I'm part of Jeannie's membership. You know, I've done all those intermittently, but I could never do anything with it. So I'm like, okay, I've gotta do something. I've gotta do something. And meanwhile, my brain's on fire. My body's on fire. I get diagnosed with a DH adhd.
[00:17:52] I was like, that's it. Makes so much sense.
[00:17:57] Kym: Yes.
[00:17:58] Carly: Now I know why I have a CEU cart with, you know, 15 different CEUs that I haven't even touched, why I've, you know, paid memberships for all these professionals that are so amazing and have so much good advice. I've never, that have never been able to implement. And so I mean, the pieces are finally like coming together and then I hear Patrick saying, doubt yourself and do it anyway.
[00:18:23] And I'm like, you know what? I'm doing. I'm doing it. So March, I take my first international trip and I go to Canada. I said, okay, Canada, you know, it's close. Like if things get bad, I can just go to Canada. It was beautiful. It was lovely. I'll go back in the summer. I didn't wanna live there.
[00:18:38] Kym: Yeah.
[00:18:39] It's cold.
[00:18:39] Carly: It's so
[00:18:41] Kym: Oh my God.
[00:18:42] Carly: So the end of April I flew to Portugal.
[00:18:44] And actually like right after I booked my tickets, this was again a woo woo universe. Megan Smith Gunnel posted her retreat in Portugal for May 20, 26,
[00:18:53] and I said, you know what? I'm gonna live there so I don't have to pay airfare. I'm gonna move there and I'm gonna live there.
[00:18:59] So I signed up for the retreat
[00:19:00] Kym: Oh, I love
[00:19:01] Carly: and it's the first retreat I've ever done, and I'm just like, oh my gosh.
[00:19:06] Kym: You're gonna love it.
[00:19:07] Carly: So, you know, this last probably four months, six months has been about my own spiritual work. I've been doing a lot of that and like recognizing my, how my intuition is really helpful and also draining. so I've been doing a lot of that. Listening to the podcast, I flew to Portugal for a week.
[00:19:26] I did this trip, and it was probably day two that I realized I don't need to scout. I can take a vacation.
[00:19:33] Kym: Mm-hmm.
[00:19:34] Carly: So I was able to decompress for the first time in, five, six years.
[00:19:39] it was transformative. So anybody who's thinking, I can't do it, I don't have the time, I don't have the money, I did it.
[00:19:46] I don't have the money. It's all on a credit card right now, and I'm just not even worrying about it because. I needed the space. I needed the quiet. I needed to really evaluate
[00:19:57] what am I doing and why do I hear all these people are loving their therapist journey
[00:20:04] and I'm not. I'm just doing it and I'm good at it, but like, I'm exhausted.
[00:20:09] Kym: Mm-hmm.
[00:20:10] Carly: I was able to find some really amazing places. I love the food. I don't have celiacs, but I do have a lot of food allergies I have, you know, rashes and like upset stomach and all the things. And I'll tell you what, Kim, I went to Portugal and I ate pizza and pasta and bread and I, whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted.
[00:20:27] No sickness, no rashes, no itchy. And I said, that's it. this is where I need to be for my physical health,
[00:20:34] for my mental health. This is where I wanna raise my kid like I want him to, to have culture and the world and just see more in a place that I can afford to travel
[00:20:46] and then also in doing so, I got licensed in North Carolina and that I'm using that, I only have one client there at the moment, but if I need to expand that, I can, because of the time zones, and I know that's a questionnaire, but I wants to know about time zones. And so I've got all of my clients in Arizona, but now I have one in North Carolina.
[00:21:07] But I can always build that so that I can see the North Carolina ones earlier for them. And then I'll see my Arizona clients later. But for me, I'll be working in the afternoon from about two or three-ish, depending on which time zone. You know, until seven maybe. I try not to work more than four hours a day because I
[00:21:28] Kym: I love that.
[00:21:29] Carly: as a single mom of a toddler, he's three. Almost three and a half.
[00:21:32] If I see more than four clients a day, by the time I pick him up, I'm just done. And I don't have anything to give to
[00:21:39] And so that's again, the freedom of living somewhere else. Owning my own practice, making my own schedule, really evaluating what's most important to me and it's not seeing 25, 35 clients a week.
[00:21:55] Kym: Yeah. No, I get that.
[00:21:56] Carly: so the plan is that I'm gonna go back in the fall, like October, November-ish and stay for two to three months. You can stay for up to 90 days without a visa and you have to have a residence, an address to apply for the Visa. Visa.
[00:22:10] I wanna go over, I'm gonna get a, you know, an Airbnb or, or something for a couple weeks and see if I can find That place to be.
[00:22:17] And then once I have the address, then I can start the application process, which is taking about six months.
[00:22:23] if I find a place immediately, I apply in October. The soonest I could move would be next April,
[00:22:29] Kym: Oh
[00:22:29] Carly: which is okay because I have an entire house. So full of stuff. Every podcast that you've done with people, like how do you get rid of your stuff?
[00:22:38] I have. Downloaded it and listened to
[00:22:40] Kym: Yeah.
[00:22:41] Carly: I'm like, I don't even know.
[00:22:43] Kym: Did you learn that The answer is just get rid of all of it.
[00:22:45] Carly: you
[00:22:46] Kym: I know?
[00:22:47] Carly: I am almost down to that point. So one of the things I, I've come up with, 'cause you know, everyone has a different opinion, get rid of all of it. Only bring your sentimentals.
[00:22:56] Kym: Mm-hmm.
[00:22:56] Carly: so what I decided to do was go try and go a little more practical so when I go in the fall, I'm gonna go shopping.
[00:23:03] And I'm going to get myself a spreadsheet and write down what would it cost to furnish a place there.
[00:23:10] Kym: So smart.
[00:23:10] Carly: And that can help me evaluate, do I wanna take anything
[00:23:15] or is the cost to ship it? Worth tracking and shipping. And then I just have my stuff, right, and I'm thinking about comfort stuff mostly for my kid.
[00:23:25] But I did this with my car. I looked at, I, I looked it up and did all the calculations on what it would cost to ship and all the different taxes versus then I went and I researched buying a brand new car there.
[00:23:36] And I really thought it would make more sense to ship it. And then I realized, no, actually it's not going to.
[00:23:42] And after driving there, oh yeah, I got a rental car. I drove a manual for the first time in probably 25 years in a foreign country in roads that aren't even big enough to be called alleys. Um, There's no way I'm taking my car. I'm absolutely gonna sell it and I'm gonna buy one over there at some point.
[00:24:00] What, it would cost and can I find the most important thing? There's only one thing I need, Kim, and that's my bed.
[00:24:07] I have back issues. I've had 'em since I was 16. I need to be able to sleep comfortably or else I can't do my job. I can't be a mom. I can't function
[00:24:16] So I may consider taking the bed and nothing else.
[00:24:20] But if I can find a, a comparable bed over there,
[00:24:24] just get one over there. So that's my plan is really to do more research via shopping and really dig into it, which is so different from how my entire life has been. I've been fly by the seat of my pants just winging it. Clearly it's led me to some challenges.
[00:24:42] So with this move, I'm really trying to be more strategic. I've never researched anything more in my life.
[00:24:47] When I started a private practice, I just did it and I figured it out. I built the airplane in midair.
[00:24:52] Kym: Yes. Well, I've seen
[00:24:53] you posting in the, in the group, but what do you guys do about this? What do you do about this? Like, I know you're
[00:24:57] like really researching this for sure. Yeah.
[00:25:00] Carly: am because I want this, this is it for me, like I want to be the traveling therapist. I want to go live abroad and I want to travel around Europe and you know, travel the world. so I have just been researching and researching how do I make it work? I. How do I you know, finance it? Because again, I am, I am part of that, I don't know, trillion dollar statistic right now with credit card debt.
[00:25:25] So I'm so super excited and every time I look at where do I start to get rid of stuff, I panic a little.
[00:25:33] But you know, I'm really looking forward to it. I'm really excited about something for the first time in a very long time.
[00:25:40] Kym: So how did you decide which part of Portugal? Because I know there's like lots of options. Don't even know how I would pick if I had to pick a place over there. 'cause there's so many beautiful options.
[00:25:48] Carly: Right. So I have Googled more in the last six months than I have in my entire life, and I have two master's degrees. So like I, there's a lot of Googling, for me, I need warm. Right. I came from Arizona. Well, I'm originally from Washington State. I went to Arizona for the weather mostly. And I, I've come back to Idaho and I'm, I'm realizing I'm so impacted by the cold in the winters.
[00:26:09] I'm so negatively impacted. So I said, where's the warmest part of Portugal? That's what I did. I just googled and I said, where's the warmest part? I know the north and Lipson and Porto is beautiful, but it's Rainier. It's gray and that reminds me of Seattle. And I was like, Nope, I already know I can't live there.
[00:26:26] So, I went and stayed in Port, which is really central in the Agar region. And then did different cities. I think we did, I did like maybe four different cities. And then when I go back, I'm gonna go west 'cause there's a couple cities I didn't get to going west.
[00:26:41] It was all phenomenal. I even drove to Spain one day 'cause I drove over to Tavira, which is only like, I don't know, 30, 40 kilometers from Spain. I said, I'm gonna drive to Spain 'cause I'm right here
[00:26:50] Kym: Yeah, why not?
[00:26:51] Carly: So I went and found a beautiful beach in Spain. Oh my gosh. It was
[00:26:55] Kym: gosh.
[00:26:56] Carly: and then I just checked out like different beaches and I found my beach.
[00:26:59] there and I took it in and I cried and I said, I'm home.
[00:27:03] Kym: I think I saw you post a picture of that too. Yeah.
[00:27:06] Carly: it was, I mean, and that's what I was looking for. 'cause I, I, you know, I hear everyone, you ask, how did you decide what country and how did you know that was the right country? And it was, it was that feeling of I'm home
[00:27:17] and I didn't get it in Canada. I got it in Portugal and I just went.
[00:27:22] Kym: That is amazing. So Southern Warm Park, Portugal, but not exactly sure. You're gonna go back and explore a little bit more to find the exact location. And then get an apartment. 'cause I, we were talking before we hit record, Maggie Dickens, we've got episodes with her moving to
[00:27:36] Portugal too. And, she didn't do that. And she shipped stuff and she like, kind of learned from that mistake that she just like picked an address and site unseen, rented a place.
[00:27:45] So I think that's so smart the way you're doing it. Like, let me just go like get a feel for this place before I put this on my Visa application and have to live here for, I think it's a year, right? You have to stay in that residence.
[00:27:55] Carly: Yeah. So one of the things I did, I was in Portugal, is Monday, the day before the infamous blackout,
[00:28:02] Kym: Oh, yes, I heard about that.
[00:28:04] Carly: I was there, that was great. So I was there Monday and I said, you know what, I'm just randomly gonna go into my Facebook group, my ex Patsy Facebook group and say, does anyone have a, like a real estate contact?
[00:28:14] Like, I dunno, I'm just gonna, maybe somebody can meet with me, maybe somebody can talk with me. 'cause I'm here and I got one name and so I reached out to her and we set up a time to talk on Tuesday. And then the power went out so we could not talk. But I knew it's almost like I, I knew no, it wasn't gonna be a big deal.
[00:28:35] Like she wasn't gonna think I bailed on her. I didn't think she bailed on. I mean, I just, there were no thought distortions. I was like, she's gonna know it's the power and we're gonna reconnect and it's gonna be fine. And that's really what I want. That easy, flexible, like no stress lifestyle. So we connected Wednesday.
[00:28:53] The day I flew out, the day I left and we scheduled a time. So right when I came home, we set up a call and we did a 45 minute call. She's a relocation specialist and like a real estate broker.
[00:29:05] Kym: Wow.
[00:29:05] Carly: I gotta touch to her and I said, well, here's what I'm thinking. Help. Again, thank you Kim Filson, ask for help.
[00:29:12] Don't try and do it on your
[00:29:14] Kym: Yes.
[00:29:15] Carly: Oh my God. So one of the things she said was, you can, she said, I would get an Airbnb for like two weeks if you're gonna stay for three months, get an Airbnb for two weeks, and then you come and, and you start looking for your three month rental as soon as you get here so that you don't do site unseen.
[00:29:33] And I was like, oh, that's really really intelligent. And then she said, or you can come to your two week Airbnb and just look for your long-term rental.
[00:29:44] the way it works is you're, you have to pay rent on a place you don't live in because of the visa process. It's just gonna work out that way.
[00:29:51] So I was like, okay, so if I find something I really love, I can go ahead and do long term.
[00:29:57] Or I can just do like the three months and call it good. And then do it again after the visa. Right? Get even a month long Airbnb.
[00:30:06] Kym: is that how it works? Like, I don't know where I heard that. It seemed like there was something like you had to like sign a year long lease, but is that
[00:30:12] Carly: Yeah, that's where, that's where I was going. You have to sign a lease.
[00:30:17] But in Portugal, you can break the lease. You get what called like a window, a notice window. you just give, I don't know, like a 90 day notice and you basically say, I'm out in 90 days.
[00:30:32] And I, I said, wait. Really, I was like, it's that easy. And she said, yeah. And I said, oh my goodness. Trying to break a lease in in America. I mean, you're paying,
[00:30:40] if you don't time it right, you're paying more to break the lease than you would to just pay the rest of the lease, move out early and call it a day.
[00:30:47] I was like, oh. So if I find a place I can sign, like my one year lease for my Visa application. I can get there and you know, there is kind of a timeframe I think but if you get there and you're like, yeah, I don't really wanna live here, you just give that window of notice and then you could move out.
[00:31:06] Kym: Oh, nice. Okay. Well that makes it a little easier.
[00:31:09] Not as stressful maybe.
[00:31:10] Carly: Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. So, yeah, I highly recommend reaching out. These Facebook groups are amazing that you get people who've done this and who have contacts and people who know people who know people. And then just even to be able to ask simple questions like, what is the best strategy for finding a place to live?
[00:31:29] And I cannot visualize to save my life. I can't even do a, a virtual tour. It doesn't register in my brain.
[00:31:37] I have to physically walk through it. So I know a lot of people will do virtual tours and pick a place that way.
[00:31:44] I still can't see it. Like geometry is not my brain's specialty at all. So that way if I go, I just get a temporary place, then I can actually visibly go walk through places, find a place, and when I go back I'll take my son with me too. So he'll get to see it and experience it. And So I'm hoping that goes smoothly.
[00:32:05] Kym: So for the, toddler, I, before we hit record, you quickly mentioned that your father was going too I guess. will he be like, help with him, like when you're working and stuff, or are you gonna do like,
[00:32:14] I wonder how does daycare work? Like how does that work?
[00:32:16] Carly: right.
[00:32:17] Kym: of that.
[00:32:17] Carly: So
[00:32:18] before I was gonna move to Portugal again, I was like, ready to travel and already became a traveling therapist. I moved to Idaho. My practice is in Arizona, right? Two
[00:32:26] Kym: That's right.
[00:32:26] Carly: So I was thinking of moving to Western Washington 'cause I need the beach. that's it. I just need the beach.
[00:32:31] then I realized, oh yeah, I can't afford to live there. That's ridiculous. But then I was thinking, I, I was already set on homeschooling
[00:32:39] I was not gonna put him in a public school in Northern Idaho. Like, no, they just introduced a bill. Again, I'm following law and politics more than I ever have in my life.
[00:32:47] And they introduced a bill to eliminate class cap sizes.
[00:32:51] Kym: Oh,
[00:32:52] Carly: you can just have as many kids as there are.
[00:32:55] Having been a kindergarten teacher with 29 kids,
[00:32:59] Kym: Yeah.
[00:32:59] Carly: kids and Oh no. So I'd already decided to homeschool him. So then I learned that in Portugal you can homeschool if you have teaching credentials.
[00:33:10] I'm a teacher. My dad's a teacher. Actually. He went back and got a master's in music education, but nonetheless I was like, all right, then we'll just do that. And then I kept thinking about it and I kept thinking about it.
[00:33:22] So what I've decided is I'm actually gonna put him into an international school for the first year at least.
[00:33:28] So we can have social support, transitional support, other kids learning the language, and then maybe ultimately end up switching him to a Portuguese school.
[00:33:38] I don't know. That's a lot of research for down the road. And so I, kind of looked into that and then when I realized that um, when I looked into Vera, they had an international school, I didn't look at the quality of it.
[00:33:49] I just looked at the cost and it cost a third of what I am paying for daycare. Talks about how expensive international schools are,
[00:33:58] right? Compared to free public education. Yeah.
[00:34:02] Compared to what I'm currently paying for daycare.
[00:34:06] I think it was like for, for his age, for like a 4-year-old, it was about like $40,000 for the year.
[00:34:11] My current daycare is about 12 grand for the year,
[00:34:14] And so I'm like, oh, well it's cheaper. But also my dad bless his heart, like has all the love and all the give that he can, but he doesn't have all the energy. So I'm
[00:34:26] Kym: Yeah.
[00:34:27] Carly: I want him to be there and, you know, he's so helpful. Anytime I've needed someone to watch my kid, I just said, be here, here's what I need you. And he's like, okay. I'm there.
[00:34:38] But he's also really struggling financially and forced into retirement via cancer and he's just, I mean, he's not doing anything either. And I said, dad, let's go travel the world. And he said, okay. I mean, I called him and I said, Hey dad, I have an idea. And he is like, all right.
[00:34:53] And I said I think I'm gonna move to Portugal. And he said, okay. And I said, and I want you to come with me. And he said, okay, let's
[00:35:00] Kym: Oh my gosh,
[00:35:00] Carly: So I know a lot of people don't have that with their spouses, with their families, like so much resistance. I mean, I'm not doing anything else. So, that way he'll get to see some of the world, he's never had a passport, so he's never traveled.
[00:35:14] And and so once we get all of his documents in line, so that's, where the October idea, I don't know if that'll happen because he has to have a passport.
[00:35:22] Also really funny story. I had a passport, just renewed it in September, held onto it for 10 years, knew where it was. Just renewed it in September.
[00:35:30] I'm like, okay, cool. I'm finally gonna use it. Couldn't find my fricking
[00:35:33] Kym: Oh my gosh.
[00:35:35] Carly: tore my house up one side down the other. Couldn't find it. Couldn't find it. So what I had to do like five days before I flew to Portugal I called my dad. I said, I need you to come stay with the kid because I have to drive to Seattle tomorrow.
[00:35:46] So I got in the car, it was a six hour drive to Seattle, and then I stayed the night, and then I went to the passport office. I said, I need a passport. They're like, when today? When's your flight leave? Oh, I'm, I drove, but I need it like now. I said, okay, come back in four hours.
[00:35:59] cool. Hang out in Seattle for four hours.
[00:36:03] But I walked in, they gave me a passport and I drove home. So it was a very quick, intense road trip. But the problem, the biggest issue I still have is that my passport is with my sons, and I still don't know where it's at. So now
[00:36:17] Kym: Oh no. My gosh.
[00:36:18] Carly: But Got worse. I now know how to get one last minute. So if any of you are trying to do your scouting trips or any international travel, you can get one in person. It's just not cheap. It was pretty easy. It just was not cheap.
[00:36:31] Kym: Oh, really? How much are we talking? I'm sure people are like, how much is it?
[00:36:35] Carly: so the actual passport itself to walkout day in hand was $225.
[00:36:40] Kym: Ooh. Yeah.
[00:36:41] Carly: Plus the cost to get to Seattle. So gas and food. I fortunately didn't have to pay for Reen board 'cause my cousin lives there. So it was probably, I'm gonna say at least 350 bucks.
[00:36:52] So again, I don't have the money for this, like what am I doing? But I just knew I had to go on this trip. I knew that I had to go see it and if Portugal wasn't it. Cool, I'm gonna start planning. Costa Rica and Greece and maybe even Uruguay, because I've seen a lot of people having a lot of success in Uruguay. Not a country I've ever thought about ever.
[00:37:12] are kind of my other like, okay, if this doesn't pan out, if this isn't home, then those are some backups. But,
[00:37:18] no, I'll just get to travel there just for fun.
[00:37:21] Kym: How exciting.
[00:37:22] Carly: Yeah, it's, it's so amazing.
[00:37:24] Kym: to hear when you just finally get there. You'll have to come back.
[00:37:28] Carly: I will, and I wanna one more thing that you keep talking about all your income streams and which has always overwhelmed me because I'm like treading water to just do my one little me private practice.
[00:37:39] And I'm like, but I so brilliant. Right? And to change the workload and to, you know, spend some time doing like group coaching versus individual therapy.
[00:37:47] So I actually have started I'm working on a coaching program and I am building it. I'm creating it. I'm so amazed that I'm doing it and I'm learning, oh my gosh, I'm learning ai. I am so old right now. I'm learning how to use ai. And I'm mind blown. I, I mean, it popped out everything that I was trying to come up with, but I couldn't find the words.
[00:38:10] I couldn't like really articulate my ideal client So, that's in the works and I, I keep thinking about that. Like I, I wanna do something else for extra income so I can decrease the one-to-one load. And I've heard that from so many of y'all that like. That is the way to go. I am getting ready to hire a virtual assistant, like it's in my, it's gonna happen again.
[00:38:29] I'm not doing it all on my own anymore. I am going to hire help. I'm trying to actually now emulate what y'all are doing,
[00:38:37] get the help I need. And so, ultimately it's gonna be a coaching program and I want to eventually do retreats.
[00:38:44] And do international retreats. So I'm really excited to go to Megan's retreat, just to kinda like, feel what a retreat is like.
[00:38:50] I wanna do some of Patrick's, but I again tapped out for money this year. it's not gonna happen, so it's a program for basically people pleasing latent life, lesbians.
[00:39:02] Kym: Wow.
[00:39:04] Carly: is my, I've decided, this is my favorite group to work with. So one,
[00:39:07] Kym: I love
[00:39:07] Carly: life lesbian. Like, oh my gosh, how do I leave my marriage?
[00:39:12] How do I even figure out if this is who I am? How do I come out? How do I start dating after 40? Okay, let's just talk about dating after 40 in general.
[00:39:21] Kym: I couldn't even imagine it.
[00:39:23] Carly: It is rough. It's rough. That's why I'm still single.
[00:39:26] But also part of this, I really love working with the boundaries and the people pleasing because so many of my favorite clients have lived their lives for somebody else, which I never have.
[00:39:38] That's not ever been my jam. I've been like hyper independent, leave me alone my whole life. But I think I connect so well with them because. I feel like I'm kind of that. Here's another place you can get to. Like you don't have to hear, you can be independent, you can do it all. You can set boundaries. You can say no, and you can create a life that you love and that works for you and your kids are gonna be okay.
[00:40:03] Your family's gonna be okay. I mean, I've been working with people coming out with gender and sexuality for years now and walking the families through, how do we all come out as a family and you're okay. You're gonna be okay. So that's what kind of came to me. And so I'm super excited to create this program and eventually I want to have the program and the retreat with it.
[00:40:25] Kym: Yes.
[00:40:26] Carly: So like, let's go to this amazing place, have all the good food, have all the relaxing, you know, have all the self care and figure out who the hell we are.
[00:40:34] So that we can stop living our life for somebody else. So that's kind of where I'm headed.
[00:40:40] so that's, that's what I'm looking for too. So I do, hopefully I would love to come back when I get that put together. I keep hearing your voice in my head, like the business besties, which I don't quite have yet, so I feel like that part is still missing. So I'm kind of working on that. So I just want you to know, like I, I listen to all your sound wisdom
[00:41:00] Kym: Oh my gosh. Thank you.
[00:41:02] Carly: hear you in the back of my head.
[00:41:03] I hear Patrick, I am so excited. To get to know Megan and, you know, do her retreat with her and Jeannie has helped me tremendously when I was going through some accounting stuff. Oh yeah. Also, I started tracking income for the first time since I opened my practice.
[00:41:18] Kym: nice. Jenny, would be proud. We're talking about Jenny Schmill. If nobody knows, she's a therapist and a CPA and she is the owner of Simple profit.com. She's amazing.
[00:41:27] Carly: Yeah. and I heard her on Patrick's podcast saying, start tracking your income. And I was like, okay, so seven years later, maybe I should start tracking my income.
[00:41:38] I just am so grateful to, to all of you and, the network that you have built and all your business besties, because I never wanted to be in private practice 'cause I couldn't see it.
[00:41:49] I couldn't see what it could be,
[00:41:52] and now I can see, whew. Now I get emotional. Now I can see what it could be
[00:41:58] Kym: Yeah. Oh
[00:42:00] Carly: and I'm so excited.
[00:42:01] Kym: I love it. I'm so excited for you.
[00:42:03] Carly: It feels good
[00:42:04] Kym: make me cry.
[00:42:05] Carly: moving from surviving to thriving. Like that's really where I feel like I'm finally like. I'm gonna own this business and I'm gonna do it in a way that's true to my values. I've always said, I'm not your typical therapist. I'm not. I'm, I am direct and I, color outside the lines and every time I check in with my clients, they're like, don't change.
[00:42:26] We love that about
[00:42:28] Kym: Oh, I
[00:42:29] Carly: Drop the F bombs, like say what you're gonna say. but again, hearing all of you talk about your growth has really inspired me, which is why I wanted to come on today.
[00:42:40] Kym: thank you so much. Yeah. It's so inspirational.
[00:42:43] Carly: yeah, for anyone that's where I was six months ago going, I'm not happy and I don't know what to do.
[00:42:48] Like. I just encourage you to listen to the people who've done it before us,
[00:42:52] the people who are living their dreams and reach out because I've not ever had one person say, I'm too busy to help you, and I'm so eternally grateful for that.
[00:43:03] Kym: Oh my gosh, what an amazing story. Yeah. And you've been through all that, but you know, all of us have got that story and it gets you
[00:43:10] to that place where it all comes together. And then it's like, because of this journey, this journey and this journey, now I've got this perfect thing that's amazing for me. You know?
[00:43:18] Carly: Yeah. I keep seeing Amber Light's little feet on the beach in Florida, and
[00:43:22] Kym: Yeah.
[00:43:22] Carly: I mean that, and that's from six years ago. I kept thinking, I wanna do something on the beach, but I couldn't wrap my brain around how or what or where, and so I just. became Became a podcast listener, and I do hope to have one at some point.
[00:43:36] I don't know if it'll be like the single mom therapy podcast,
[00:43:40] that's a whole other ball of wax. Or if it will be more in aligned with like my, my coaching program and, I don't know.
[00:43:47] Kym: It's such a good niche. I've never even heard people talk about that niche really much.
[00:43:51] So, you hear about programs out there and stuff, it's just awesome.
[00:43:55] Carly: Well, thank you. I look forward to it and I hope when I come back I can share a plethora of progress and you know, just again, providing some hope and inspiration for those that are contemplating but aren't quite sure.
[00:44:10] Kym: Yes. Oh my gosh. Thank you so much for coming today. I really appreciate it.